Hoping for Answers

As I mentioned in an earlier post, I've been extremely upset lately. I've been a basket case and have felt very anti social, very useless, alone and bored. I don't want to talk and i don't want to be touched. I want to be alone! So, I called the doctor and left a message. My son, unfortunately has taken the brunt of my anger and anxiety. I am always yelling at him. And have had thoughts that I should be turned in for. Hopefully the doctor will have some answers for me. Hopefully they can help me out if this funk. Hopefully I can return to normal soon.

So mad!!!

I don't know what my deal is. But lately, I've been blinding, rage type of mad! Everything just ticks me off! And if I'm not raging, blinding mad, I'm crying my eyes out. I'm a hormonal mess all over again! And no steroids :( Lord help me! Give me grace overflowing! I can't do this without you! I need your strength to see me through this night!

Hair it comes! :p

Last night as I was getting ready for bed I realized something strange on my head. It took me a second to realize it was hair!! I'm growing hair! It's patchy, and coming in kind of 2 different colors (blonde with brunette patches) , but it's there! And it's mine! Things are looking up! :D

Sounds Good

Just got lab results back from the doctor. Everything is looking really good! All my levels have lowered to closer to where they should be! And he said my lungs sound amazing!

I do need to get a scan of my brain just to make sure everything is still ok.  I've been having some vision issues that he believes are a side effect of the chemo pill. But just to be on the safe side he wants a scan. I can't argue with that. 

Anyway, he also says I need to back off with what I'm doing at home chore wise. He said I'm taking on too much too fast. Looks like I'll be reigning it in some for a while!

On a more positive note, I'm being eased off of my daily pain med! If I can get off of it completely I can drive again! Hooray!

So that's my little update for you all!
Thank you for the prayers and support! God bless :)

Buzz me, please :)

I am bald. There's no way around it. There is no need for me to go to a salon to even get shaved. However, there seems to be one exception to this. For some reason the hair at the nape of my neck likes to grow.
It's actually kinda of funny if you can picture it. Two little, nickel sized patches of hair at the nape of my neck. Just chillin'. My own weird sort of mullet. :p
Anyway, I noticed these mullet patches were growing and looking kinda funky. After commenting on it to Keith, I very calmly asked him to "buzz" them for me.
I've seen the pictures of cancer patients getting a "buzz" cut from significant others, or family members. But I never pictured myself as being one of them. It was surreal feeling him take the trimmer to those small patches on my neck. All those pictures I've seen passed before my eyes.  But they were quickly replaced with 'thank goodness the mullet is gone!'. (After all, it took him all of 30 seconds to complete the task.)
The one last thing that I was left thinking was, 'wow! What an incredible husband I have!'. I love him so much <3

Feeling Better

These past few days have been rough. For the past 2 nights I have been fighting really bad nausea. Yes, even tossing my cookies repeatedly. I took every anti nausea med I had and was still sick! I was so exhausted Saturday that I forgot to take my pain pill, which just added to the misery I was in.
Thank goodness for my wonderful, amazingly incredible husband, who not only made me homemade chicken soup, but took care of Johnny all day! Did I mention he managed to do some work too!? The man never ceases to amaze me! God truly blessed me with him! I don't think I would be feeling better if he hadn't stepped in to let me rest. Thank you baby!